New Vision

I am not a visionary person...I am too literal...too concrete...I am a visual person...meaning that I cannot envision a thing very easily...I need to actually see it....  therefore I buy things and return them..and buy more things and return them too....I think when I see something at the store that it will work perfectly in my setting....match exactly...fit well...but often I am wrong, my vision is not all that clear...when I see it actually in the setting...with the dress..etc..it isn't right....maybe even just a bit off...but rarely does it work perfectly....this is often silly and sometimes totally annoying with sweaters and shoes...but downright scary with big things like carpet colors or counter top purchases. 
Of late we have been looking to purchase a sofa....a big huge sofa that has to be custom ordered and cannot be returned...and I have ideas about what I like and what I want and what will create the "look" I'm going for...but face it.. for me, it is an overwhelming and daunting task...my thoughts are jumbled...I have a general direction...but is that even the right thing....and its too big and too expensive to mess up!

 So there we sit...my husband and I...on our old sofa pouring over pictures online and trying to see size and depth and skirt height and arm width...did I mention that my husband is visionary...he always has been...in every way; from direction for our lives to fashion prediction to sports team choices to the world of the spiritually prophetic...he is a visionary...and that gift applies to everything.  He can just simply "see".

It is as it says in Roms 11:29

"For the gifts and calling of God are without repentance."   So I look and look...and try to convey to my visionary husband what I sort of see...what I think I want to see...but am viewing very much through a glass darkly.... In a while...we sort of narrow things down and I think he is beginning to understand what I think I want. We have even found a picture or two that sort of kind of looks like it....maybe...the one with square arms and boxy cushions....or maybe I like that other one we saw with the round arms and puffy cushions....Ack! Then just when I am growing frustrated and overwhelmed and think we will never sort it all out...suddenly he says to me....look at the picture....now look around our room.....now....close your eyes and see that sofa in this room..... And suddenly....I can see it!  I can see it in my mind's eye...and now I can decide if it looks right...if it is what I really was thinking to start with or if I want a different direction completely. He has helped me and shown me how to see.   This is also a gift my husband has....he can take my jumbled ideas and focus them...and refocus them until I can see clearly what my own thoughts and ideas were in the first place...he sharpens the view for me...putting the pieces together until things become clear..or at least clearer. He helps to clarify my vision... And low and behold...I may see exactly what I was looking for or even something totally unexpected...but it is so exciting to really "see"!   I think the Lord has a way of doing this as well...sharpening and focusing our view until we see exactly what he wanted to show us all along...often using the very thing we were looking at to start with but clarifying it, adjusting it until it is distinctly clear.  He gives us new vision....  and it is so exciting to see!   Mark 8:23-25 And He took the blind man by the hand and led him out of the town, and when he had spit on his eyes, and put His hands upon him,  He asked him if he saw ought. And he looked up and said, I see men as trees, walking... after that He put his hands again upon his eyes and made him look up:  and he was restored, and saw every man clearly.

The New Normal

 

This talk of  "All things new" got me to thinking about different times in my life when things became new and I realized something....Sometimes "new" doesn't translate to "good"...not in our human eyes anyway.  So many difficult things, difficult times are really all about things being "new".  They say change is inevitable but change is usually pretty hard. Loss takes away the things we are accustomed to, comfortable with, happy with....and insecurity, doubt and even pain fill the void.
I remember my parents' divorce and the "new" life we had to adjust to...one without a father in the house...I remember the death of my grandmother, the matriarch of our family, and the "new" life our extended family experienced when she was no longer present to unite us....the experience of changing schools and being the "new" kid...or dealing with the "new" culture of the Northeast after being raised a Southern girl.  I recall losing a job and getting used to the dramatic drop in income and the time when all of my children had finally moved out for good and I knew they weren't coming back.

So many times in life "new" doesn't seem all that "good" at all ...suddenly we are faced with complete upset...loss of health, finances, homes, jobs, friends...loved ones...everything normal is turned upside down and we have no choice...We are held captive to it, enslaved against our will to what we have lost, what can never...ever be regained...the finality of it.  All things are indeed new...in a difficult, scary or even terrible way, what was... is no longer... and we must adjust...we must learn to live with the "new normal".  Such are hard times....only "good" in the eyes of Him who sees all things, the end from the beginning, and works all things for our good and His glory.

 and I say with the Psalmist,

		Ps. 69:1-3 Save me, O God, for the waters have come up to my neck. I sink in the miry depths, where there is no foothold. I have come into the deep waters; the floods engulf me.
		I am worn out calling for help; my throat is parched. My eyes fail, looking for my God.   Ps. 69:13-14 But I pray to you, LORD, in the time of your favor; in your great love, O God, answer me with your sure salvation. Rescue me from the mire, do not let me sink. and He doesn't let us sink...

A New Song

My husband got a new job....I got a new car....I got a new kitchen....It sure is exciting and refreshing to get new things.... but they rarely come with out effort.  Certain things usually have to happen first before pleasant new things come into our lives.  We need training and experience for that job, we need finances and decent credit for that new car, we need planning and direction for that new kitchen..and patience. Very little in life is gained by simply the passing of time...In some way, some how, work is being done, whether seen by man or not, to prepare...to lay groundwork for things that will come down the road.  Sometimes it is hard plowing that is being done....sometimes gentle pursuit....other times just the gleaning of experience and learning what not to do....
I think it may be the same with spiritual things.... growth, vision, attitude, ministry, passion, direction, gifting, calling, joy, peace...on and on. At different times in our lives as we walk with the Lord, He graciously brings us into newness in all kinds of areas....but preliminary work must be done before any "new" thing is birthed in us or through us. Thankfully He never ceases to pursue us and work in us and on our behalf.

He is singing over me a new song in this season....I don't know exactly what that means yet but these verses are being impressed into my spirit...

Zeph. 3:14-17	Sing, O daughter of Zion; shout, O Israel; be glad and rejoice with all the heart, O daughter of Jerusalem.
	The LORD hath taken away thy judgments, he hath cast out thine enemy: the king of Israel, even the LORD, is in the midst of thee: thou shalt not see evil any more. In that day it shall be said to Jerusalem, Fear thou not: and to Zion, Let not thine hands be slack. The LORD thy God in the midst of thee is mighty; he will save, he will rejoice over thee with joy; he will rest in his love, he will joy over thee with singing.
	So excited to see what He has in store for me this year...it feels joyful!